GoinG hOMe..

I am leaving for 2 months. I don’t know what’s going to happen to us. Things have been so beautiful and exciting. I never dreamt of having such beautiful moments with you. You have always been there for me. I am so grateful to you for actually taking the time to come for my graduation. It meant a whole lot to me. I did not have anyone from home, but you made everything complete. When i saw you, it just made my day, it felt as though my whole family was there with me. But what’s going to happen after this. Its such a great feeling when you introduce me as your ‘gal’ to everyone. But we are not together. Aren’t you ever going to ask me out? Is it just going to be like this till i leave Bemidji. You know i am complying because i love you. But this is not my culture and you know it. And i am not looking for a short term relationship, maybe that’s why you are taking so long to decide. But remember that no matter what happens or how far we are, you would be in my heart and i am not saying this just to make you happy but it is from deep down my heart!

When i leave, i am going to miss ya smile, your smell, your hug, your jokes, the way we cuddle and everything else that has always manage to bring a smile to me. I hope you feel the same way too. I hope your not going to party and go he wrong direction. Because if anything like that does happen, i would never be able to face you anymore!!! But i do trust you though sometimes it’s very difficult because like you always say, ‘people have needs’.

wINtER hOLIdAYs 2007

This is a whole new adventure for me

as i walk in the Minneapolis airport

I wonder what i am doing

all alone in this unknown Kingdom.

I walk through the security gates

and bid farewell to my friends,

my heart felt heavy and scared,

i never went anywhere alone

i was always surrounded by people who care

but now i have a destination to go by myself

Though this was a long awaited holidays

why do i feel insecured?

I watch people walk pass me

so many with different identity and characteristics

they stare at me like i am from Mars

But i held my head high and walked through the gates

and sit quietly in a far corner

wallowing myself in a good romance book

i miss my family and i wish that my journey was back home

But i should appreciate this next destination

cuz i still get to see my cousins!!

WaItInG…

I am contented whenever you are around

You are perfect in many ways

Yet you leave me thinking…

What do you want?

Where are we going with this?

I am so frightened deep down

But I am just living each second

Cuz whenever you are by my side

I feel loved, and passion just

Surges through my spine

When you hold me and give me a kiss

My whole world turns bright…

Though it hurts to know that I am not yours

But each day spent with you shall

Be kept in my memory bank

At least the memories will bring me a smile

When my days are down

And if you ever plan to move away

Remember I love you now

And I might be in love

My whole life through!!!

DeePeST fEArs..

Each day spent with you bring new beginnings

I don’t know where it’s going to end

but i am enjoying every moment of it…

I am scared to say those three words

I am scared you are going to think i am lying

because i know, you don’t think people can fall in love.

But what if i did?

what if my feelings are true?

I want to spend the rest of my life in your arms

I want to show you off to the world

I want my parents to smile and be proud when they see you

But what if it ends in midway,

without me telling you anything.

I will regret my whole life, but these are my deepest fears!!!

And till i get my courage, ill keep everything deep down

and savor each second spent with you…